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Premiered: Saturday, April 14, 2001

Episode Transcript [Closed Captioning][]

No              FRee

           RiDeS

directed by

Aaron Springer

storyboard artist

C.H. Greenblatt

written by

Aaron Springer

C.H. Greenblatt

Mr. Lawrence

animation director

Tom Yasumi

creative director

Derek Drymon

                      NARRATOR:

           Here we are again at the

Bikini Bottom Boating School.

MRS. PuFF’S

B O A T i N G

S C H O O L

MRS. PuFF’S

B O A T i N G

S C H O O L

W A L L

Today is once again the day of

SpongeBob’s boating school exam

but more importantly, this is

the last test for the year

and if SpongeBob does not

                       pass this one

it means another whole year

              of boating school!

( crash, glass breaks )

( crash, glass breaks )

( groaning )

Wha’ happen?

Oh, nothing, SpongeBob.

            You just struck

another pedestrian.

Minus 20 more points.

How many do I have?

Negative 224.

Negative 224.

How many more minutes

left in the test?

The test is over.

That’s enough time!

I can make up

those points!

No… SpongeBob!

Wait! You didn’t hear me

( screams )

It’s too late! SpongeBob!

( coughing )

Okay, Mrs. Puff,

what’s my final score?

Six.

Whoo!

And how many

do I need to pass?

Six.

Ooh…

Hundred.

Wha…?

Six hundred.

You need 600 to pass.

You got six.

Don’t worry.

I’ll be all right, Mrs. Puff.

Besides…

This means I get to

be in your class

for a whole

‘nother year!

Well, see you

next Tuesday.

Yeah!

MRS       P       u       F       F       ’       S

B            o       a       T       i       N       G

              S    C    H    O    o    L

           ♪ I’m gonna get

my driver’s license ♪

♪ and it’s only gonna take

one more year, one more year ♪

               P       u       F       F       ’       S

B            o       a       T       i       N       G

              S    C    H    O    o    L

♪ One more super-duper year ♪

♪ One more super-spectacular ♪

                       ♪ extra-magical,

extra-fantastical year… ♪

( thinking ):

   Oh, Neptune.

Another year with him!

Barnacles!

Dirty barnacles!

I’ve got to do something

                       to save myself.

Oh… there’s only one way out.

A teacher’s ace in the hole.

Extra credit!

What was that, Mrs. Puff?

Extra credit, SpongeBob.

Extra credit, SpongeBob.

The extra credit.

( laughing wildly )

I still have a chance.

I, I mean,

you still have a chance.

What’s extra credit?

It’s when you get credit

for the things you weren’t

           able to do before.

♪ Oh… ♪

M   r   s   .   P   u   f   f   ’   s

B   O   A   T   i   N   G

   S   C   h   o   O   L

Now, are we ready

for that extra credit?

Extra credit!

That’s the spirit.

That’s the spirit.

So, all you have to do

to earn your extra credit

           and pass my class

           and never have to come

anywhere near this school again

is write a ten-word sentence

on what you’ve learned

in boating school.

But I’ve learned so many things.

           Just pick one,

I don’t care which.

Here, I’ll help you

get started.

“What I learned

in boating school is…”

There! That’s already

seven words!

Only three more!

L-E-A-R…

( pencil breaks )

Oh, barnacles!

W H A T      I

L E A R

What’s wrong?

Got to sharpen my pencil.

W H A T      I

L E A R

( whistling )

Hmm…

( humming )

Hmm?

( singing )

N-E…

( pencil snaps )

Oh!

( whistling )

Give me that!

Here’s a pen.

Give me that!

Here’s a pen.

A pen! One of the most permanent

           of all writing utensils.

♪ Gonna write an essay ♪

♪ That’s what I say. ♪

There.

Fantastic! Let me see it.

No, wait, I changed my mind!

I’m sure it’s fine.

Just let me see.

No, don’t look!

It’s not ready.

It’s so simple!

Only ten words!

           “What I learned

in boating school is…”

Blankety… blankety… blank!

I can do this. I can do this!

           “What I learned

in boating school is…”

                       “What I learned

in boating school is…!”

I can do this, I can do this!

Aah, aah… is it hot

in here, Mrs. Puff?!

Why is it so hot in here?!

                      Aah! My hand!

My hand is cramping, Mrs. Puff!

Make it stop!

You only need

three… more…

words!

( grunts )

Okay, let me see

what you’ve written.

It’s not ready yet.

That’s okay, SpongeBob.

Show the teacher

what you’ve written.

No!

Give it to me!

No!

Let me see it!

           “What I learned

in boating school is…”

           “What I learned

in boating school is…”

Uh…

    W H a t         i         L E a R n E d

i N     B o A T i         N G

    S c h o o L                   i s       h o w

🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣             d  R  i  V  e

🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣🚣

       🚣🚣🚣🚣

🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽                🪼🪼🪼🪼   

🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽                🪼🪼🪼🪼   

🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽🧽                🪼🪼🪼🪼   

   🧽    🧽                              🪼🪼🪼

   🧽   🧽                               🪼🪼🪼   

        Pat                                🪼🪼🪼

Well, the rest doesn’t matter.

Well, the rest doesn’t matter.

You pass! ( laughs )

You pass!

           Mrs. Puff, I don’t feel

like I really did anything.

That’s how extra credit

is supposed to feel.

Really?

Besides, here’s

your license.

Besides, here’s

your license.

B     I     K     I     N     I     B     O     T     T     O     M

                 D R I V E R     L I C E N S E     C L A S S :    S

EXPIRES:  12-14-03                       A 1 3 5 6 0 2 1

                                S P O N G E B O B  S Q U A R E P A N T S

                                1 2 4  C O N C H  S T .

                                B I K I N I  B O T T O M

                                 SEX : M     HAIR:     YELLOW     EYES:     BLU

                                                HT :  0-04     WT:     1oz     DOB:07-14-86

                                                    SpongeBob         SquarePants

My license!

It tastes just like

I dreamt it would.

Mrs. Puff, I…

Thank you, SpongeBob.

Congratulations.

Have a nice life.

Look out, Bikini Bottom!

There’s a new driver

on the road

and his name is…

SpongeBob SquarePants!

         ( echoes ):

SpongeBob SquarePants!

SpongeBob SquarePants!

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la ♪

♪ La, la, la, la,

           la, la, la… ♪

Aah!

Ooh, ow…!

♪ La, la, la, la,

la, la, la… ♪

Ouch.

           ALL:

Happy birthday!

♪ La, la, la, la, la, la, la. ♪

( thumping and grunting )

So much destruction.

L      i      V      E

This reporter asks why.

Local consensus places the blame

           on this negligent,

selfish driving instructor

who… oh!

♪ La, la, la, la,

la, la, la… ♪

Let’s… not… use that take.

That’s preposterous.

He did the extra credit.

( laughs nervously )

There’s no need to worry.

He doesn’t even have

           a boat to drive.

Now to go home and have

the rest of that pasta.

( chuckles )

Aah!

           ALL:

Surprise!

           ALL:

Surprise!

  T    H    A    N    k        Y    o    U

M    R    S    .        P    U    F    F    !

To the greatest

teacher ever!

Thank you,

Mrs. Puff.

I know I speak

for everyone

when I say that

we consider you

a member of

the SquarePants family.

( kissing )

( kissing )

I think you’ve made

your point, dear.

  T    H    A    N    k        Y    o    U

M    R    S    .        P    U    F    F    !

Ahem.

Mrs. Puff, we were

starting to think

  T    H    A    N    k        Y    o    U

M    R    S    .        P    U    F    F    !

SpongeBob was

never going to

get his license.

But you never

gave up on him.

You never quit.

You never took

the easy way out.

Well, I, uh… okay.

We wanted to make sure

Mrs. Puff--

the greatest driving

teacher in the world--

  T    H    A    N    k        Y    o    U

M    R    S    .        P    U    F    F    !

the greatest driving

teacher in the world--

was here to see this.

See what?

Ta-da!

BURM

“I-M R-DY.”

WSL L67                                                                               IV    Gh

i         M         -         R         D         Y

            B  i k i N i            B  o T T O M

                      BOTH:

A brand new boatmobile?!

For me…?

Oh…

T                   H

                                   M

Don’t worry, Mrs. Puff.

He’ll be driving by tomorrow!

                       Toodle-oo!

What have I done?

Everyone will know

that I let him slide

           through school.

I’ll have to move

           to a new city

start a new boating school

                       with a new name.

No… not again.

I’ve got to end this thing

            before it begins.

( crickets chirping )

           You took quite

a buster there, son.

                      What I learned

in boating school today is…!

We’re going to have to

                       hold off

on the driving there

for a while, son.

That’s right, honey.

Now, just stay in bed.

And no going

near the boat.

( door closes )

Hi, Boaty.

( squeaks )

           ( gasps )

Boaty, you’re cold!

Take my socks.

           Oh, Boaty, I’m always

going to take care of you.

You’re the best boat

in the deep blue sea.

( kisses )

( sighs )

( rattling )

( rattling )

I hope I still remember

           how to do this.

Yeah…

( starts engine )

( SpongeBob snoring )

( SpongeBob snoring )

Hey, I’m driving!

( both scream )

( grunting )

Who are you and what

are you doing in my boat?

And why are you wearing

that ski mask?!

Because you’re not skiing!

Oh, my gosh, I know who you are!

No, you don’t!

You don’t know who I am.

Yes, I do!

I know that you’re…

a boatjacker!

I never thought I’d have to

           use this pepper spray.

( screams )

Somebody help me!

Somebody help me…!

            Sorry, SpongeBob, but

it was for your own good.

( panting )

Give me back my boat!

( panting )

( panting )

( panting )

Ay… yi… yi…!

You’d better stop this boat!

( grunts )

( grunts )

I’m… not… letting… go!

Nothing will stop me!

Not even… ( gasps )

Giant clams?!

G       i       A       N       T

C       L       A       M       S

                  🦪

( snapping and yelling )

I’m… not… letting go…

             even for… ( gasps )

Cheese graters?! No!

Cheese graters?! No!

          C       H       E       E       S       E

G       R       A       T       E       R       S       !       !

                            🧀

Ouch… no… no… no…

            ow… oh… oh…

If… you think I’ll let go

                       for a little…

Educational television?!

Educational television?!

Oh, no!

( screams )

Looks like that

got rid of him.

Now for some tunes.

( static )

And now back to KRUD

with all of your personal

“You won’t get away with

stealing my car!” hits.

( screaming )

         ( grunting,

tires squealing )

         ( grunting,

tires squealing )

                                                       A  C  C  i  D  E  N  T  E  ?

                                           5    5    5    —    1    2    3    4

Hey, look.

S U P E R

     ⭐

  C O P

( engine revs )

( both screaming )

                                     ⭐

( both screaming )

S U P E R

     ⭐

  C O P

Oof, oof…

                                        ACCiDENTES?

                                                CALL

                                         555—1234

               ⭐

Argh!

I’d never let you

have this boat.

              ⭐         ⭐

Not even if you were…

( gasps )

Mrs. Puff?

( flapping lips )

( engine revs )

                       ACCiDENTE?

                 555 — 1234

      ⭐

( siren wails )

So, how’s it going, Mrs. Puff?

Uh, SpongeBob.

I’d like to… apologize.

I shouldn’t have passed you.

You really weren’t ready.

So, I guess I got to give

           my license back, huh?

I hear Mrs. Flounder is starting

a new class Monday morning.

You kidding? You’re the only

teacher for this student.

And besides, the warden says

           she’ll let you go early

if you do her a favor.

What’s that?

Free driving lessons!

( laughing )

Bikini  Bottom

         JAiL

  • Home Video Releases

SpongeBob SquarePants: Sea Stories DVD (November 5th, 2002)

SpongeBob SquarePants: The Complete 2nd Season DVD (Disc 2) (October 5th, 2004)

SpongeBob SquarePants: The Complete 2nd Season DVD (Disc 2) (October 19th, 2004)

SpongeBob SquarePants: The First 100 Episodes DVD Disc 4 (Season 2) (September 22nd, 2009)

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