SpongeBob SquarePants: The Complete 1st Season DVD Disc 2 (transcript) (10/28/2003)

DVD Release Date: October 28, 2003

Theme Song Transcript: SpongeBob SquarePants Intro (5/1/1999) [Closed Captioning]

Are you ready, kids?

KIDS:

Aye, aye, Captain!

I can’t hear you!

Aye, aye, Captain!

♪ Oh… ♪

♪ Who lives a pineapple

under the sea? ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Absorbent and yellow

and porous is he ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ If nautical nonsense

be something you wish ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Then drop on the deck

and flop like a fish ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ Ready?

SpongeBob SquarePants! ♪

♪ SpongeBob SquarePants ♪

♪ Spongebob

Squarepants ♪

♪ Spongebob… SquarePants! ♪

( Captain laughs )

SpongeBob

SQuarePaNtS

( plays flute tune )

created by

Stephen Hillenburg

Episode Transcript: Nature Pants (SpongeBob SquarePants) (transcript) (9/11/1999) [Closed Captioning]

NaTuRE

PaNTs

storyboard director

Paul Tibbitt

storyboard artist

Mark O’Hare

written by

Paul Tibbitt

Mark O’ Hare

Peter Burns

animation director

Sean Dempsey

creative director

Derek Drymon

( sizzling )

( loud buzzing )

( all pop to life

and commence buzzing )

( pop )

( buzzing )

J   e  L  L

F   i   E   L

KRABS:

SpongeBob. SpongeBob!

Wake up, boy!

You’re burning me money!

( stammering )

( alarm sounds,

SpongeBob yelps )

Mr. Krabs, what do we do?

Here, use this.

( grunts )

( clang )

( flames whoosh )

( both whine in fear )

( blowing frantically )

( teeth chattering )

( imitating fire alarm )

( gurgling )

Hooray! Hooray!

( steam whistling )

( sizzles )

SpongeBob,

come into me office.

What’s wrong, boy?

Well, I…

This is the fourth time

I’ve had to scrape you

off of something.

Well, I’ve been thinking.

We need to get you

thinking about work.

No offense, Mr. Krabs,

but I’ve been thinking

about giving up

my cold industrial life

in favor

of a more natural

and free life

among the jellyfish.

( laughs heartily )

T H E

K R  u  S  T  y

K R  a  B

( laughter echoes )

Ah… SpongeBob,

you wouldn’t last

even one day

in the wild.

This is your

natural habitat.

This is your

wide-open range.

These are

your amber waves.

And this… oh, this

is your golden scepter

with which you rule!

That’s better than nasty old

jellyfish, right, SpongeBob?

SpongeBob?

Oh, I can too

last more than one day.

I’ll show him.

Aw, barnacles!

SpongeBob, wait.

( screams )

Oh, he’ll be back,

all right.

He’ll be back.

And Squidward,

I want you to have

my can opener.

And I thought

this friendship

would never pay off.

Are… are… are…

are you sure you want

to give me this mayonnaise?

It’s all yours.

And these

old phone books?

All yours, old friend.

Patrick, there is

one more thing

O L   ’    R E  L i  A B L E

I want you to have.

O         L      ’       R     E     L    i    A     B           L    E

( gasps )

( glass breaking )

( panting with excitement )

Ol’ reliable?!

( sobs )

Howdy, y’all.

Hey, SpongeBob, you

having a garage sale?

O  L   ’  R  E L  i  A   B L  E

No, Sandy, I’m giving up

my material possessions

to live in the wild

with the jellyfish.

SpongeBob, of all

the crazy schemes

why would you want to

live amongst the jellyfish?

They’re cold and mean

and none too bright.

Oh, oh, Sandy, that’s exactly

the response I would expect

from someone who lives

the sham of a life

I once lived.

I’ll prove I don’t need

this stuff to be happy.

Maybe someday

you’ll wise up and join me.

Good-bye.

( pop )

I won’t be needing these.

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz…

He took off

his pants.

I’ll give him

a week.

I’ll give him

11 minutes.

Patrick sad!

J      e        L      L         y        F       i        S     h

F            i       E           L               d          S

I’m… home.

J  e    L   L    y    F   i   S  h

F       i   E      L       d     S

I’m home! I’m home!

J e LL y F i S h

F i E L d S

J e LL y F i S h

F i E L d S

I’m home, I’m home, I’m home,

I’m home, I’m home, I’m home

I’m home, I’m home!

( sudden buzzing )

Brothers and sisters,

wait for me.

( buzzing )

Buzz, buzz-buzz.

Okay, I’m here.

Wait, I just got here.

My jellyfish instincts

tell me to go…

( slurps )

( pops )

…that way.

♪ Buzz, buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz… ♪

( jellyfish buzzing )

( chomping )

( gags )

Mmm, this is the life.

Hey, everybody,

buzz, buzz.

Buzz to you.

Buzz, buzz.

Nice current today.

Hey, what’s the buzz?

Hello, I’m JellyBob--

and you are…?

( electricity crackles )

Uh… nice to meet you.

( sniffing )

Mmm.

Here, Patrick,

have a Krabby patty.

( choking up )

There he is, Patrick.

Say your line.

“Why, thank you, Sandy.

“I would love one.

“(take patty).

“Too bad SpongeBob

isn’t here.

“These are his favorites.

“I sure wish he’d come home.

(take bite).”

I can’t do it!

SpongeBob!

Come back!

Patrick, I’m not coming home.

I miss you.

Sandy misses you.

Even Squidward misses you!

Whoopee!

( lively Latin music playing )

I’m happy here.

This is my home now.

( Sandy grunting )

( sobbing )

SpongeBob!

( buzzing )

Hey, everybody, I’m back.

I think I’m getting

the hang of this.

( panting heavily )

Patrick, what are you doing?

If I can’t have you as a friend,

I’m going to make you a trophy.

I even picked out

this nice jar for you.

S P  O  N  G  E  B  O B  -   F   R  I E  N  D

Patrick, go home.

I’m a jellyfish now.

( gurgling cry )

( panting )

( meows )

( continues gurgling cry)

PATRICK:

I can see

you there.

I still see you.

You’re going

to look good

on my mantel.

Friends forever,

SpongeBob!

( panting slowing down )

Ahh.

Ahh.

I got you now, SpongeBob.

( straining )

Patrick, no!

( SpongeBob panting,

Patrick yelling)

( grunting )

Okay!

So this is the way

it’s going to be.

I hope you’re happy.

( groans )

Well, that’s over.

Back to jellyfish matters.

( drip )

Mmm, jelly.

( buzzing )

Ah, my jellyfish brethren

are returning.

Greetings, comrades.

( electricity crackles.

SpongeBob screams )

( screaming )

Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!

Ooh! Ow! Ow…

Being a jellyfish sure is fun.

Buzz… buzz…

( crack )

Buzz.

( shivering )

( pop )

( resumes shivering )

Hey!

Ew, I’m itchy.

Itchy-- Why am I so itchy?

( screams )

Poison sea urchins.

Ow, ow, itch, itch,

itch, itch, ow

ooh, ow, ow, ow, itch, itch,

itch, itch, itch, itch…

Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz,

B  i  k   i  N  i

B   O  T T O M

buzz, buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz, buzz,

buzz, buzz…

( thud )

C L O   S E D

( muffled ):

Krabby patties.

Buzz…

( sniffs )

Buzz…

( sniffs )

Sandy…

Buzz, buzz, buzz…

( sniffs )

Buzz, buzz, buzz…

What have I done?

I had a great life and friends,

and I gave all of that up.

ALL:

Welcome home, SpongeBob!

W    E   L    C  O   M    E        H  O  M  E

You guys are the best.

I made a huge mistake.

Please forgive me.

Ah, quit your blubbering

and have a Krabby patty.

Don’t mind

if I do.

And I’ll see you at work

first thing

tomorrow morning.

Aye, aye, Captain!

SpongeBob, do us

all a favor…

Don’t mind if I do.

( snaps pants loudly )

Ta-dah!

Aw.

Okay, that’s enough.

( growls

affectionately )

( all ooh and ahh )

( meows )

Could we please

stop this?

Patrick itchy.

ALL:

Ooh! Ow! Oh! Ow! Ooh!

It is great

to be home!

Episode Transcript: Opposite Day (SpongeBob SquarePants) (transcript) (9/11/1999) [Closed Captioning]

OPPOSiTE

DAY

storyboard director

Chuck Klein

storyboard artist

Jay Lender

written by

Chuck Klein

Jay Lender

Mr. Lawrence

animation director

Tom Yasumi

creative director

Derek Drymon

( crowing )

( snoring )

( SpongeBob and Patrick

jabbering )

Huh?

( jabbering stops )

( jabbering resumes )

Huh?!

( blows noisemaker )

BOTH:

Surprise!

Happy birthday, Squidward!

♪ Happy, happy birthday! ♪

♪ Happy birthday cake! ♪

♪ Happy, happy birthday! ♪

♪ Pin the tail

on the sea horse! ♪

♪ Happy, happy birthday! ♪

♪ Happy birthday, Squidward! ♪

( SpongeBob cheering,

noisemakers blaring )

SPONGEBOB:

So long, Squidward,

bye-bye.

Don’t do anything

I wouldn’t do.

PATRICK:

Another year older.

It’s not my birthday!

That’s it!

I’m moving out

of this neighborhood.

REALTOR:

Absolutely, Mr. Tentacles.

I can sell your home

in a heartbeat.

Oh, that’s great news

because I want to move

as soon as possible.

No problem… as long as it’s

not infested with nematodes

or surrounded

by troublesome neighbors

or something like that.

Oh, sure, there’s none of that.

Did you say neighbors?

Of course! I can’t tell you

how many times

I’ve seen a sale fall through

because of bad neighbors.

Neighbors, uh…

Anyway, I’ll be by tomorrow

to check out the house.

See you then.

SpongeBob.

No one will ever buy my house

with him living next door.

Whatever a good neighbor

would do, he does the opposite.

Opposite… opposite.

( rooster crowing )

( loud, noisy music playing )

( yells )

( banging and whistling )

Uh, Squidward…

why are you

playing a drum?

Drum?

What drum?

This is just

my wig case, see?

( cackles )

Come on, SpongeBob, tackle me!

Squidward, you need bed rest.

I’ll keep

you safe

until you’re

well again.

Oh, I get it.

You don’t know

what day it is, do you?

Uh, Wednesday?

Why, it’s Opposite Day.

You mean,

you’ve never heard of it?

Boy, have you been missing out.

Opposite day is

the one day of the year

when you get

to act different.

Normally I’m stuffy

and boring,

but today I’m silly

and spontaneous.

( giggles )

Does everybody know

about Opposite Day?

Oh, sure.

It’s a game, get it?

Oh, a game.

Yeah.

Normally, you’re

really loud and annoying,

so what are you

going to be today?

Quiet and out of the way.

Yay!

Yeah.

Why don’t you get a jump on it?

( exuberantly ):

I love…

( gruffly ):

I mean, I hate

Opposite Day.

( giggles )

( yelling ):

I’m not running!

So long, chum.

And good-bye, Bikini Bottom.

( door slams )

Gary, it’s Opposite Day,

and I’m…

walk, don’t run--

and I’m going to…

opposite, opposite.

I’m just going to crawl into bed

and do nothing all day.

Too bad it only comes

once a year, huh, Gary?

( meows )

Gary, where’s your

holiday spirit?

( barks )

( doorbell rings )

Company!

I hate company.

Who’s there?

It’s Patrick.

Patrick… go away!

I never want to see you again!

( giggles )

( whimpers )

( sobbing )

SpongeBob doesn’t like me

anymore!

That’s right.

You’re my worst enemy.

( sobbing )

Patrick, you’re not really

not my friend.

It’s just Opposite Day.

Opposite Day?

Hey, I’ve

heard of that.

You have?

No! What is it?

Well, whatever

you normally do,

today you do

the opposite.

Let me try,

let me try.

( straining )

( still straining )

Patrick!

Patrick, breathe!

( exhales loudly )

( gasping )

Not that opposite.

Let me show you how to do it…

the wrong way.

Meow.

Meow.

( speaking backwards )

( laughing )

Say, want to help me

do some work

around the house, worst enemy?

Nope.

( laughing )

( Squidward cackles )

Nearly noon

and not a peep from SpongeBob.

( satisfied laugh )

I’m almost sorry I’m leaving.

( cackles )

Opposite Day.

( crashing )

SpongeBob, what are you…?

( yells )

Hello, Squidward.

Oop, I mean,

good-bye, Squidward.

Ah, isn’t Opposite Day…

terrible?

( laughs )

( groaning )

I’ll tell you what’s terrible:

living next to you!

You’re the

worst neighbor in history!

Wow! That’s the nicest thing

Squidward has ever said to me.

If the real estate agent

sees that mess,

I’ll never sell this house.

PATRICK:

Isn’t it beautiful?

On Opposite Day it is.

( rumbling )

Out of the way, SpongeBob!

( hammer pounding )

I don’t get it.

I made my house a mess,

which was making it clean,

which made Squidward

clean my yard,

but that really means

he’s messing it up.

But the opposite

of clean is filth,

which means

filth is clean.

That means

Squidward’s really

making my yard a wreck,

but I’d normally

wreck my own yard,

which means

Squidward’s being

the opposite

of Squidward,

( meows )

which means

he’s SpongeBob.

Aha! I understand

everything now.

I must be the opposite

of SpongeBob by being…

( in Squidward’s voice ):

…Squidward.

Hey…

I want to be opposite, too.

( snaps fingers )

Yeah, finally!

Yoo-hoo!

♪ I’m Squidward,

I’m Squidward ♪

♪ Squidward, Squidward,

Squidward. ♪

SPONGEBOB:

Wait.

It’s not enough to look like

Squidward to be opposite.

( in Squidward’s voice ):

You have to act like him, too.

Boy, oh, boy, do I like

playing my clarinet.

I practice and practice

all day long,

but I never get any better.

( in SpongeBob’s voice ):

Now you try.

Okay.

( inhales )

♪ I’m Squidward, Squidward,

Squidward, Squidward. ♪

BOTH:

♪ I’m Squidward, I’m Squidward ♪

♪ I’m Squidward, Squidward,

Squidward. ♪

After you,

Mr. Squidward.

Why, thank you,

Mr. Squidward.

You’re quite welcome,

Mr. Squidward.

Oh, Opposite Day.

Next time it’s going to be

“go jump off a cliff” day.

( tires squeal )

Oh, my.

The house is even more beautiful

in person.

Hello, mist…

uh, Mr. Tentacles?

( in Squidward’s voice ):

Yes, please come in.

It’s funny. I pictured you

being much taller.

Yeah, everyone

says that.

Now, if you want

the sale to go through,

you’ve got to tell me

all the positive things

about your house.

( in SpongeBob’s voice ):

Positive things-- Opposite Day.

( in Squidward’s voice ):

I’d love to.

The floor creaks,

the roof leaks.

There’s

a terrible draft.

Uh… well, you didn’t

mention that on the phone.

Please, let me finish.

The winters are harsh.

The summers are brutal.

There’s a wild man-eating clam

in the backyard.

Now, would you care to see

the rest of my home?

Well, I-I’m not sure

if I’m interested.

Nonsense.

I won’t take no

for an answer.

( honking laughter )

Please follow me.

And here’s the worst room

in the house: my gallery.

Oh, my, this painting

is very nice.

( screams ) Thank you.

Who’s that?

I’d like to introduce

you to Mr. Squidward.

You’re both Squidward?

I’m Squidward.

He’s Squidward.

BOTH:

We’re both Squidward.

Ah, well, that’s done.

At least SpongeBob

has been quiet.

( screams )

No!

( playing squeakily )

Okay, I really

don’t want to

hear another one.

Okay.

( tooting )

I really don’t want

to hear more,

thank you.

I hear you

loud and clear.

( tooting )

SQUIDWARD:

Stop!

Get away from her!

Oh, oh, I am so sorry, ma’am.

I-I hope these

two barnacle-heads

haven’t harmed you in any way.

Who are you?

Why, I’m Squidward.

What kind of fool

do you take me for?

He’s Squidward?

He’s Squidward?

You’re Squidward?

I’m Squidward!

Are there any

other Squidwards

I should know about?

( in Squidward’s voice ):

Meow.

I’m out of here.

Ma’am, please.

What about my house?

I wouldn’t sell a house

for you

if you were

the last Squidward on earth!

Wait!

Don’t…

go!

( screams )

No, no, no! ( grunting )

Please sell my house.

Never!

Don’t leave me here!

( crying )

BOTH:

Happy Opposite Day, Squidward.

We hate you.

( low rumbling )

( bell dings )

Let me show you guys

how much I hate you.

( engine revs )

( yelling )

Patrick, you ever feel

that Squidward

likes us too much?

Happy Opposite Day!

Credits: SpongeBob SquarePants: The Complete 2nd Season DVD Disc 2

NaTuRE

PaNTs

OPPOSiTE

DAY

EXECUTiVE PRODUCER

Stephen Hillenburg

LiNE PRODUCER

Donna Castricone

ART DiRECTOR

Nicholas R. Jennings

SUPERViSiNG DiRECTOR

Alan Smart

STORY EDiTOR

Peter Burns

WRiTERS

Peter Burns

Mr. Lawrence

Carl Greenblatt

Derek Drymon

Stephen Hillenburg

SCRiPT COORDiNATOR

Alex Gordon

CAST

Carlos AlazraQui                                                                                     …………….. Jellyfish/

                   Fire fish (debut) (Fireman)/Scallops and clams (Clam)/Gary the Snail (character)

Clancy Brown                                                      ……………….. Eugene H. Krabs (character)

Tom Kenny ……… SpongeBob SquarePants (character)/JellyBob (debut)/Rock snail (Snail)/

                                                                                                         Gary the Snail (character)

Rodger Bumpass                                                  …………. Squidward Tentacles (character)

Bill Fagerbakke                                                                          …….. Patrick Star (character)

Carolyn Lawrence                                                                      …. Sandy Cheeks (character)

Sirena irwin                                                          ……….. Incidental 49A (Real Estate Agent)

CASTiNG DiRECTOR

Donna Grillo

CASTiNG COORDiNATOR

Alex Gordon

EXECUTiVE ASSiSTANT

Jennie Monica

SUPERViSiNG SOUND ENGiNEER

Krandal Crews

2ND ENGiNEER

Jim Leber

ASSiSTANT ENGiNEER

Justin Brinsfield

AUDiO SUPERViSOR AND DiALOGUE EDiTOR

Tony Ostyn

ANiMATiC OPERATOR

Brian Robitaille

ANiMATiC SCANNER

Kevin Zelch

ASSiSTANT STORYBOARD ARTiSTS

Carl Greenblatt

Bruce B. Heller

Bill Reiss

Soonjin Mooney

Kurt Dumas

ORiGiNAL CHARACTER DESiGN

Stephen Hillenburg

CHARACTER DESiGNER

Todd White

PROP DESiGNER

Thaddeus Paul Couldron

CLEAN-UP ARTiST

Soonjin Mooney

ARTiST iNTERN

Cynthia Tello

LAYOUT SUPERViSOR

Kenny Pittenger

BG LAYOUT DESiGN

John Seymore

Paula Spence

BACKGROUND PAiNTERS

Peter Bennett

Michael Chen

Andy “Spike” Clark

Calvin G. Liang

Richard D. Ziehler-Martin

DiGiTAL BG SUPERViSOR

Andrew Brandou

DiGiTAL BG COORDiNATOR

David Wigforss

DiGiTAL BG ASSiSTANTS

Stephen Christian

Steven Kellams

SUPERViSiNG COLOR STYLiST

Teale Reon Wang

COLOR STYLiST

Dene Ann Heming

ASSiSTANT COLOR KEY

Meg Hanna

PRODUCTiON COORDiNATORS

Megan Brown

June Tedesco

PRODUCTiON ASSiSTANTS

Marcy Dewey

Derek iversen

SHEET TiMiNG

Andrew Overtoom

FiNAL CHECKER

Karen Shaffer

POST PRODUCTiON DiRECTOR

Heather Adams

POST PRODUCTiON SUPERViSOR

Wendi McNeese

POST PRODUCTiON ASSiSTANTS

Matt Brown

Mishelle Smith

Shawn Trask

PiCTURE EDiTOR

Lynn Hobson

POST PRODUCTiON SOUND

SUPERViSOR AND MiXER

Timothy J. BorQuez

SOUND FX DESiGNER AND EDiTOR

Jeff Hutchins

DiALOGUE ADR EDiTOR

Jason Freedman

RE-RECORDiNG MiXERS

Timothy J. BorQuez

Timothy J. Garrity

FOLEY MiXER

Brad Brock

FOLEY ARTiST

Diane Greco

MUSiC EDiTOR

Nicolas Carr

MUSiC COMPOSED BY

The Blue Hawaiians

Sage Guyton & Jeremy Wakefield

Steven Belfer

Brad Carow

MUSiC CONTRiBUTiONS

Lovecat Music

SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS

THEME SONG

LYRiCS BY

Stephen Hillenburg

Derek Drymon

COMPOSED BY

Hank Smith Music

ON-LiNE EDiTORS

Kip Gibson

Dan Aguliar

DAViNCi COLORiST

Dexter P.

POST PRODUCTiON SERViCES

Todd AO - Hollywood Digital

Anderson Video

Encore Video

ANiMATiON SERViCES

Rough Draft Studios, Korea

OVERSEAS SUPERViSOR

Doug Williams

LiVE ACTiON iSLAND FOOTAGE BY

Bad Clams Productions, inc.

TiTLE STiLL PHOTOGRAPHY BY

David Frapwell

DEVELOPED BY

Derek Drymon

Tim Hill

Nicholas R. Jennings

PRODUCTiON EXECUTiVE

Eric Coleman

EXECUTiVE iN CHARGE

OF PRODUCTiON

Brian A. Miller

CuLtURE

SHoCk

F.U.N.

MuscLeBob

BuffPaNts

SQUiDWARD

THE UNFRiENDLY

GHOST

The

ChApERoNE

EmpLoyEE

oF

ThE MoNth

ScAredy

PaNTs

I WAs

A TeeNage

Gary

SB-129

KaRaTe

CHoPPeRs

SLEEPy TiME

SudS

VaLeNtiNe’S

DaY

the

PAPER

Closing Logo: United Plankton Pictures Inc.

United Plankton

Pictures inc.

Closing Logo: Nickelodeon Haypile

NICKELODEON

© 2003 Viacom International Inc. All Rights Reserved.

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and logos are trademarks of Viacom International Inc.